Well folks, my bags are all packed and here I sit, somewhat anxiously, awaiting my flight. Today, I head to Boston. Well, New Hampshire technically.
I’m going to visit a friend for her birthday. A bunch of us are flying in from all over the country to spend time with her for the weekend. It’s a bit of a corrective experience for her. Last year, her then-boyfriend completely broke her heart on her birthday. It not only ruined her birthday, but also ruined the next year of her life as she processed the pain of what he did — not just on her birthday, but throughout the duration of their relationship.
So, we are all gathering around her this weekend to give her the birthday she deserved last year, and still deserves this year.
The experience of planning this birthday trip for her has filled me with gratitude for where I am in my life right now, and to whom I have given seats at my table. I have the right friends. The ones who are considerate, thoughtful, and safe. Friends who love each other and pour out that love in special ways. Friends who can disagree with each other (you know there is always going to be clashing of ideas and personalities when planning a big event like this), and do it with respect and in good faith. Friends who you don’t have to fear will hurt you.
I’ve been blessed to have many great friends throughout my lifetime. But, I’ve also had a few bad ones. Friends who didn’t really care about me, who used me, who saw themselves in competition with me. Those friendships took more than they gave. I’m thankful to be in a place now where my friendships are truly healthy, and the seats at my table are filled with the right people.
Do you have friendships that truly nourish and fulfill you? If not, why are you keeping those friends in your life? Perhaps it’s because you don’t like conflict. Maybe, instead, it’s that you’ve been through a lot with those friends and feel that it would be disloyal to walk away. Or, maybe you just don’t know how to start the conversation. Whatever it may be, I invite you to take some time to ask yourself why you are accepting less than you deserve in your friendships. When you find the answer, start working on it.
You deserve the right friends. The right people at your table. Love yourself enough to find them.
So, with that, I’m signing off for now. I hope you all have a lovely weekend, and I’ll see you when I get back.
