I owe an apology to all the Disney adults I secretly rolled my eyes at when I was in my early thirties.
I didn’t get it. I was fighting so hard to feel grown up — to feel like I’d finally arrived at the loosely defined concept of adulthood to which we were all supposed to be aspiring. Watching people my age lean into activities from our childhood felt like a betrayal of that, and so, I called it cringe.
Ahh, the arrogance.
Now, two weeks away from my fortieth birthday, I’m in the process of planning not one but two Disney vacations for my family in the upcoming year. One of them is for my entire family (kids and all) at Christmas. That one is easy to justify, since Disney is for kids, after all. But the other one is just for me and my husband. We are going on a Disney cruise to celebrate our tenth wedding anniversary, and it’s just us.
Not only are we going to Disney sans children; we are also planning on Disneybounding. If you’re unfamiliar with that word, it essentially means dressing up in an homage to Disney characters. Disney has strict policies about costumes at the parks and on the ships, but they have no problem with guests wearing outfits inspired by Disney characters, using colors, patterns, and accessories to subtly emulate their look. So, even though our trip isn’t for another six months, we’re already finding our character inspo.
As I share our Disney Adult journey, I’m learning we’re not alone. It turns out that a lot of people my age—specifically, those of us currently arriving at forty or very close to it—are finding ourselves drawn to the nostalgia and childlikeness of Disney. We are the elder Millennials who probably grew up with a strong sense of personal responsibility. Some of us carry the weight of criticism from Boomer parents and family members who said our generation would be entitled basement-dwellers our whole lives. Others of us were first generation college graduates, or maybe even first generation American citizens, and we felt the burden (whether that came from our families or from ourselves) to be remarkable. Whatever the reason, we grew up feeling duty-bound in a way that perhaps younger Millennials did not. So, the idea of being a Disney adult felt ludicrous, if not downright laughable, to us.
But life has put us all through the wringer since the COVID-19 pandemic found us. We’ve endured lifetimes of trauma in these short five years, and I think it’s given us some perspective. We elder millennials are discovering that maybe we don’t want to be the responsible adults anymore. Well, at least not any more so than we have to be. We want to feel carefree and cared-for. We crave courtesy, connection, and maybe someone to bring us our drink while we dip our feet in the water. Maybe we just want someone to say, “Hey, take it easy. We’ve got everything covered.” But not in the oh, the rich people have arrived way. We want it the way we got it when we were children; when we weren’t being coddled because we were rich and entitled but because we were loved—when our parents wanted to watch us take in all the magic without having to worry about a thing.
It’s certainly why I find myself becoming a Disney adult. As a highly anxious elder Millennial who also happens to be a Capricorn, I am pretty tightly wound. Personally, I haven’t found anywhere on earth where I find that kind of care and courtesy. Sure, if you’re wealthy enough you can be coddled anywhere. But to be treated like a kid again? To have people seem to genuinely care that you’re taking in every moment of magic through child-like eyes, no matter your age? I think it can only be found at Disney.
So, I think that’s where you’ll find a lot of us elder Millennials in the upcoming years. If you see one of us, say hi. We’re probably a little socially awkward, but also deeply interested in genuine connection. Bonus points for Minnie ears.
Amber Wardell is a doctor of psychology and author who speaks on women’s issues related to marriage, motherhood, and mental health. Subscribe to the free newsletter to get exclusive content delivered to your inbox and to never miss an upload.
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